November 29, 2021
From Ben - Locked and Pinned
Happy Monday!
It's still cold as a fresh mint and a drink of water, but hey, it's an adventure.
My goal this winter is to not complain about the cold. I've already failed on multiple occasions, but we're steadily improving. (Commenting on the cold to connect with others doesn't count as complaining either...) Either way, I'm going to need a couple dozen more layers as it slowly gets chillier and chillier. (That is if I stay in Timmins , we find out tonight if one of us is staying or going)
From Thursday to Friday we had an exchange with some of the Elders in the district. I went with Elder Myers to Sudbury, and Elder Baines came up here to Timmins.
Now, Elder Myers is a legend.
He is an ultimate challenger in the sense that he calls it as he sees it and he doesn't avoid conflict when he feels it's needed. He is adept at being himself and is confident in what he knows. So. In a nutshell, there was a lot I could learn from him.
We went street contacting where some cool looking Christmas lights were set up and met a Romanian guy, his wife and their kids. Their 5 and 7 year old sons (estimated) wiped the floor with us in a quick game of soccer, we wished them a merry Christmas, and went our separate ways.
These little interactions really make a day unique and exciting. Since then, I think it'd be cool if I had a Romanian accent. Maybe in the life to come. We'll see.
That same night, me and Elder Myers, in Sudbury, put up a service ad for Timmins (where we offer our services to anyone who'd like) It was a big mistake because out of nowhere messages started flooding in about people needing help shoveling and moving. However, I was in Sudbury, and Elder Hartman was in Timmins. Elder Hartman didn't know about the service ad I had put up either. So, all of a sudden I started coordinating these service opportunities from Sudbury for Elder Hartman in Timmins. It was wild and confusing.
In the end I just had to start telling people that we weren't able to help them till the next day, when I got back. When I did get back there was this one lady who wanted us to pick up a dryer for her and deliver it to her house. It was an adventure, wow.
We cleaned the back of our car, put the seats down, picked up the dryer, brought it to her house, nearly died coming down the stairs (the quote of the moment from Elder Hartman was "Slow down, slow down! I can't see where I'm going), my left forearm was like "woah, WOAH. What the heck are you doing to me?" and we set it down.
The lady said thanks, and we left.
The next day the same lady asked for help with some groceries; so, we coordinated a couple pick ups from the members, went back to her house, did the one grocery load delivery (our arms laden with bags of food) knocked on the door, gave them the groceries, and peaced out again.
King Benjamin says "when ye are in the service of your fellow beings ye are only in the Service of your God"
It's actually kind of tricky to get into that mindset. No word of a lie, I personally thought me and Elder Hartman did a fair amount of work for this lady, and, for some irrational reason, I expected a bit more recognition. I thought maybe the lady would be down to hear a Gospel message, or want to get to know us a bit more. But a simple thank you was the reward.
Which, at the moment, wasn't enough. However, as the spirit whipped my silly notions into shape, I came to realize that was partly what King Benjamin was implying. We should serve others because we love God. And knowing that He is happy with our efforts should be the greatest reward. The cool next consequence of course, is that when we do serve others for God, we start loving them more than if we had done it for them.
We're getting there one day at a time :)
Another old lady wanted us to buy and deliver a cake for her daughter's 39th birthday. We didn't do it in the end, but we had a confusing and fun conversation with her. (This same old lady is set on selling me the dream catchers she makes. They're actually really cool, so maybe someday I'll cave)
I'm getting ahead of myself though!
When I was still on the exchange with Elder Myers I got to learn how to wrestle. (You heard me)
My physique is quite average, and because I wear glasses, I have never really tried the activity. Elder Myers had also done some wrestling in Highschool and is pretty built, so naturally I was a bit uncertain.
True to everybody's predictions, I got thrown around like a rag doll.
It was a blast.
I got pinned and locked five times but it was so much fun.
This one time he had me in an arm lock (I don't know wrestling terminology) and Elder Myers was like.
"Alright, Elder Smith, break free"
I tried so hard, my goodness. In the end however, his lock was sound. I had nothing on Elder Myers. It was basically an impossible task to best him. But it was so much fun to try. To try to conquer an impossibility.
The cool part about working with an Omnipotent God is that the things we deem impossibilities become possibilities, if it's aligned with His will. God loves impossible odds I think. To redeem the seemingly irredeemable, to heal the irreparable, to love those seemingly unworthy of it. It's all part of His Character. In fact, God will make the odds even more impossible to prove exactly what power he holds.
David and Goliath, Gideon and the 300, to be the Creator of the universe and be born in a manger and calling average Joe's to build His Kingdom and be Apostles, The Restoration of His Church through a young farmer, to call 18-20 year old youths and expect them to change lives and teach about His kingdom on earth, to call a nerdy, 5'6" me, who is scared of the opinions of others and expect him to teach with power and authority and make a difference in someone's life.
Thank goodness God works this way. Because life is made up of impossibilities. Half of them so, because we are remarkably flawed and imperfect.
I'm really coming to love the title of Redeemer.
On Sunday I had the chance to play a piano piece for Sacrament Meeting. I played Angels We Have Heard On High. I had only had the hymn sheet music but threw in a couple of arpeggios, minor chords and musical variation (the spirit definitely helped with some of the musical choices)
I was stressing as I usually do before a performance, but it went pretty well in the end. Someone commented "it sounded like you had an orchestra with you up there" which I thought was a pretty cool thought, and an actual angelic possibility.
A little while back me and Elder Hartman watched The Best Two Years (We're pretty sure it's allowed) and it got me thinking. I'd heard a quote from President Monson, who was quoting somebody else (see his talk, Finishers Wanted) who said something along the lines of "Vision without effort is daydreaming, and effort without vision is drudgery"
And I decided I needed a vision; of who I wanted to be and what I wanted to accomplish on my mission.
I decided to call it Project Calhoun. I'm still working on making this plan, but a couple of the core points in it are.
1) I want to be converted to Christ.
2) I want to be worthy of a daughter of God that I can spend the rest of my life (and beyond) with
3) I want to be confident in, and worthy of the Melchizedek priesthood I hold.
4) I want to be a master teacher and scriptorian.
It's still fledgling and there's a lot of adjustments I need to make to meet these requirements.
But that's a part of life I guess.
Also, keep Wendy in your prayers. We had to move her Baptismal date back a week. She's got to overcome some Word of Wisdom difficulties.
Love you all!
It's gonna be a wild week upcoming
- Elder Smith
1) The service ad we put on Facebook
2) Us delivering the dryer
3) Part of the Christmas lights me and Elder Myers got to look at
4) Us feeding our Tim Horton's white hot chocolate addiction
5) Breaking the rules to fix our car tire because the KalTire was backed up.
6) Some crazy snow during our exchange
7) Robin, one of the friends who is praying about baptism sent this cool text.
8-9) A wild conversation with a guy we barely know who texts us every day
Dear Ben,
My personal social media fast is ongoing and it’s really a fascinating thing. It’s like treading water in an ocean of opinion and you know drowning is inevitable so you look around and realize there is an island nearby that was never noticed before. You climb out onto the warm sand still dripping with other people’s opinions, memes, and TicTocs and it takes awhile to dry. Pretty soon you notice all sorts of things that were there all along but you were blinded by the sea water and weren’t aware of at first; beautiful foliage, nutritious food, colourful birds. The world is opening up again for me and it’s marvellous.
I dipped my toe back in this weekend to do a little catch-up but I only lasted about 10 minutes before I retreated back onto my island oasis. I’m not sure how long this will last but I’m feeling more clear-minded, more productive, happier and all around better for the absence of social media. It’s really nice to think my own thoughts again. I love your FB page, btw. So positive, not in-your-face, fun and, of course, I love you tons, so that helps.
Dad was reading Jordan Peterson to me and he says every person should have a specific goal for their mental wellness (along with other things). I’ve never considered mental wellness something that should be delegated to planning for, but it makes sense. I love seeing/hearing your annotations in the margins. Dad will read a bit, then say, “Ben wrote this in the margin …” and it’s like you’re involved in our discussion. It’s lovely. And joyful. Thanks for that.
This week in one of my personal study times, I found a Morning pages prompt that captured my imagination. It says, “At the end of this day, what do you want to look back on with joy?” I wondered if a person could actually plan for joy. Haha. I mean, isn’t it just an awareness thing about how magical life really is? So I got thinking about joy, what it means (it’s much more than happiness. It’s knowing that you matter, that your life has purpose and intention, that a loving God is your partner and has a plan for you, etc, etc.) and there is a jolt of realization that joy is like that island, there all along, waiting for us to pay attention.
So I DID plan for joy. I carved out a 45 minute window to put up Christmas lights. Haha. And I went through the day noticing all the joyful things (Dad’s warm hands, a pure white weasel crossing the highway, laughing with the girls, reading out loud, the taste of food, and so on) and when I got home at the end of the day, so tired … the lights were there to greet me, glowing happily. They infused me with new energy to clean up before bed. So it turns out finding joy is a combination of planning for AND noticing.
Also (Steph will be proud) trying something new … a yoga practice called the Sun Salutation (which is ironic because the sun comes up hours after the routine). I do it upon waking, before I get dressed and it takes 5-10 minutes. This means I’m actually wide awake for my morning prayers.
It’s this idea of “flowing” through the poses to center and unify the mind-body-spirit connection. I know it sounds a little woo-woo but it’s extremely effective. By the end of the routine I feel electrified and relaxed at the same time. Very strange. But it’s fun to try something new. I just have to remember to keep my shoulders dropped because I tend to hunch them up.
Also …
Coco is jealous of the kittens.
And Mia cut her hair.
We had Tatyanna over for supper yesterday, thanks to Abby’s invitation and the boys’ picking her up. We didn’t notice any tics at all so I hope she’s doing better. I cooked my first Autoimmune meal. The list of foods-to-avoid is extensive and the list of foods-to-include quite a bit smaller. We had turmeric chicken in lettuce wraps with broccoli and spaghetti squash on the side. No butter.
Then we forced her to watch Toy Story 4 which she had not seen. Poor girl. She may never want to come over ever again.
Time will tell.
The girls are in Leduc all the time now. Recently Abby asked if we could drive to the school by 7:30 p.m. and bring your face in for a conversation. They miss you and want to tell you all about it.
I’m continuing my Jesus study and love love loving it. I’ll have to try to find words for what it does for me but I haven’t figured out how to articulate it yet. There’s power there abs i don’t know why. Amazing.
I did something brave. Jeannine (neighbour on the hill) invited me to a “girl’s night” at her house. I really like this new friend but I know from experience that when I go somewhere where there is alcohol and I don’t partake, it makes people feel uncomfortable, kind of like a vegetarian at an all-meat barbecue. I mean, what’s the point of them attending, right? And it’s too complicated to explain about covenants so usually I just wouldn’t go.
But I did!
I arrived with chocolates in hand, met all her friends, oohed over the charcuterie board, chatted it up then explained my family was at home waiting for me to decorate the Christmas tree. And made a discreet exit after telling everyone how nice it was to meet them. It was perfect.
Oh, I can hear the girls talking to you right now. Haha. Abby is telling you about her surprise award while she was photographing the awards ceremony. $150 unexpectedly was such a boost to her.
I love that we get to talk to you. I love you, baby boy. We all love you. You add such a beautiful dimension to our family.
Have a fantastic week.
Plan for joy and notice it!
Remember that Jesus Christ is real and involved in the tiniest aspect of our lives, always there. An island oasis.
Love,
Mom
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